


Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder

by Skyline_e



Series: Mental Health [5]
Category: One Piece
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Mental Health Issues, OCD, Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder, canon world, mental health
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-16
Updated: 2017-12-16
Packaged: 2019-02-15 16:16:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,272
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13034808
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Skyline_e/pseuds/Skyline_e
Summary: Ace is still on the ship, the Moby, trying to take the captain's head, and the crew was trying to act friendly, but he wasn't stupid and knew it was a play, and he would take the captain’s head. But first, he needed to get through the morning, and damn, why was one of the commanders ruining everything? (OCD)(A mental Health Fic)





	Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder

**Author's Note:**

> Hello everyone, here is the next mental health topic
> 
> As the name of the story says, this will be an Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder(OCD) fic. Also, a small language warning
> 
> I hope everyone enjoys and please do read the note at the end, as it has information about OCD as a whole
> 
> Read and relax

Thatch gave a frustrated sound, bored, and wanting to do something,  _ anything _ . It was early, and of course, everyone was still asleep, and would be so for a couple more hours. As he was walking around, to see if he could find  _ anything _ \- excluding boring things as duty- he blinked when he heard shuffling and someone speaking. Who was awake? No one was awake before the clock was 7, so this was weird. He walked around the corner, seeing a window open, which was to one of the rooms, private at that, and he knew whose room it was too.

It was the fiery brat, Ace’s, room. He didn't know he was a morning person, always being out late in the mornings.

What if he used time to be late? Of course, the kid would do that, to not be around them. So screw that! He would drag the kid out and get to know him better! The kid was still trying to assassinate Pops, but who was the kid trying to kid?- he gave a snicker at the pun internally- the kid would never manage to take Pops’ head, and he had been lazing off and almost,  _ almost _ , seemed to try and be a bit around them, not always trying to kill Pops, so this would be good.

He walked to the door and opened it, startling the kid who was making his bed, looking startled. “Kiddo! Let’s have fun! I’m bored!”

The kid blinked, before giving a glare and a half-sneer. “I have stuff to do, moron.” He snorted. “Like what? Lazing about! Come on!” He moved and grabbed Ace’s arm, dragging him out, not caring about his protests. Ace was dressed, he had made his bed, and looked ready for the day. What else could the kid possibly need to do?  _ Nothing, _ that was what, and he would be with him. And, he would be sure to drop by in the mornings to grab Ace, he looked so awake now, not at all tired, like he was used to being up early. He would not let the kid rot away alone in his room, he needed to get out.

Thatch wanted the kid out to get to know him better, and for him to not be bored!

Ace was tense the entire day, seeming to want to go back to his room, and Thatch had stopped him every time. He wouldn't let the kid run away and hide in his room; he would be here with them, him, and they would have fun. The kid, who ate a lot- him still having nightmares of running out of food and the kid starving after finding out how much he ate- seemed to eat a bit less, maybe since he was out earlier.

See? This would be good for them and the kid!

\---x---

Thatch gave a laugh, hearing a joke Curiel said, the other commander being awake early too. He liked when people were up early, but it was fine nonetheless, Ace had been up with him the last week, him getting the other in the mornings, as he was making his bed, being up early.

The kid still tried to argue he had things to do, but meh, it was more fun to be out than in the room, Ace just needed to understand that. The kid even tried to run off during the day, but he kept him out, having decided to help Ace along with being out with them, going to be nice. The kid had even tried less and less to assassinate Pops, which was perfect.

The only few times he wasn't around the kid, was during meals, seeing as he needed to help around in the beginning, and every time he was finished with it, Ace was gone. The kid probably ate a quick meal before going on. He would usually find the kid hiding out or in his room, and grabbed him to do some fun. As now, being close to the railing, just relaxing after checking things out, Ace close by, for some reason seeming a bit on edge. It was most likely since they hadn't been docked for a while; everyone really wanted to dock now. Ace, at times, seemed to scratch his arm, he had half-noticed. After a bit, Curiel left, needing to do some commander stuff.

Thatch frowned, looking at Ace, who, once again, scratched his arm, hand moving under his small jacket.

“Is your arm itchy or something?” Maybe he should get a cream or something if he had a rash. Ace blinked, not seeming to have realised he was scratching himself. “No,” Started Ace. “Or kinda. It’s just a small bug bite.” He gave a small chuckle. “Have had those myself, they suck. Try not to scratch too much, that would be bad.” Probably a mosquito or something, they could be around here- not that he had seen or heard any- and it was nearly impossible to  _ not _ scratch. Those things needed to be scratched so bad.

Ace gave a nod to it, stopping the scratching. But, half an hour later, he did it again, seeming to be the same spot, on his arm a bit up his sleeve. He guessed this was one of the reasons he had started wearing a jacket the last couple of days, so the mosquitoes wouldn't bite.

Thatch was glad he hadn't been bitten himself, it sucked. Poor kid, needing to face the hardships of a mosquito bite.

\---x---

Ace gave a breath, trying to calm himself, trying to see if he could find a way out of the damn fourth commander’s view and back to his room. He needed to fix the bed, close the door, check the window, and stuff,  _ and the chef wouldn't let him _ .

He hated not being able to do his usual routine. But it also made him mad. It was just a routine, why was it so important to him? It was just a few stupid things. But, it felt  _ so wrong _ to have not done it, and he didn't get why. He knew, half-knew, why, but still. He gave a small flinch, his nails touching a sore spot at his arm. Damn, he needed to stop that scratching thing. But, he was nervous! And, he didn't get why he was so nervous, he didn't get why. This had never happened before.

When dinner came and the fourth commander, who also was the chef, left, Ace took the chance and got to his room, doing what he hadn't been able to in the morning. But, it still didn't feel right. It felt wrong, it all felt wrong, needing to do it all again, never able to do it right now. Damn the chef, why did he have to ruin this thing?

Before he could finish, the chef was there, dragging him out again to see what was happening out on deck. Ace moved his hand to his arm, scratching again.

He wasn't able to calm himself, it didn't feel right. Why didn't it feel right? Why did the chef ruin everything and not listen to him?

It was just a stupid thing, but he needed to do it, though, he couldn't because if the stupid commander. He needed to be faster, he needed to be up earlier.

He needed to do it.

\---x---

Izou gave a sigh, needing to go and tell people they wouldn't be docking soon, Marco just having told him, knowing many was excited for it, wanting to get off the ship. They haven't been off the boat in months now, not since they picked the new brat up, which was 3 months ago. He even wanted to be off the boat himself for a bit.

Speaking of said fiery brat, Izou had noticed he had been up early the last week, being with Thatch, not looking tired, so he would be awake now. It was one of the reasons he decided to do that first, knowing the kid would fume about it. Just to get it over with. When he got to the kid’s room, he gave a quick knock, hearing the kid inside the room, speaking to himself, hearing only murmurs through the door. When he got no answer, he decided to just walk in, wanting to get the hardest part over. He hoped the kid wouldn't do anything, as he had used an hour to get ready today, his makeup and clothes being perfect. He would throttle the other if he did anything.

But, when he saw the inside, saw Ace, he froze as he blinked, taking what he saw in.

Ace was standing in front of his bed, no shirt or anything on, making his bed, muttering, “come on, come on, he will be here soon, I need to finish before he comes. Come on, come on.” It was muttered, making the bed again and again, doing a small count when he did, Izou seeing the 3rd, 4th, and 5th time from what Ace said. But, what had him halt the most, was what was on his arm.

It was _badly_ scratched up. It had wounds, scrapes, being red, and a few scratches even bleeding, looking awful.

Izou carefully stepped back and out of the room, closing the door. He had seen this before, and it was  _ bad.  _ Ace also looked  _ thin _ \- he looked  _ starved. _

He swallowed, before he walked hurriedly back to Marco, needing to tell about this. Screw not being able to dock yet, this was more important. As he was walking to the watch room, he noticed Thatch having a smile, seeming to walk towards Ace’s room. It made him frown, remembering what Ace had been muttering, moving to grab Thatch by his ear, making him squeak and give a few pained sounds. “Ouch ouch Izou! What have I done?!”

He gave a glare to Thatch, which had the man look at him with dread, realising he had done something. Before the man could say anything, most likely make p an apology, Izou spoke, being sure to keep the glare. “You are going to leave Ace alone today.  _ Got it? _ ” Thatch blinked, frowning. “Why? What have I done?” He couldn't be this stupid. He had been with Ace the last days, Izou having seen the chef keeping Ace from his room, but hadn't had a chance to think about it. He couldn't be this dense.

“If you go to his room, or keep him out,  _ you will be sorry. _ Now, if you excuse me, I need to go and speak to a few  _ certain  _ people.” Thatch gave a nod, and he let go, giving a last glare. Thatch knew he was serious, and wouldn't do anything, at least not yet, and he did look nervous as Izou said the last part, knowing he would include other people, that being Marco and a few others. Izou didn't have time to deal more with Thatch right now, needing to inform Marco and Bay. Ace’s arm looked  _ bad. _ As he continued, he saw Thatch look confused, before heading towards the galley, which was good.

When he got to the watch room, he saw Marco leaving it, blinking as he saw him there. “Izou? Aren't you supposed to tell-” He cut Marco off, opening the door to the watch room, giving a glare to the three in there. “Everyone out,  _ now. _ ” Everyone blinked, and when no one moved, he gave a glare, which had them scrambling. Everyone dreaded when he was mad, him not being kind, being one of the harshest ones if mad enough. As they were away, he looked at Marco, who had a frown, realizing something serious was up. “Sit.” The man moved to half-sit on a desk, looking at him. “What is it Izou, yoi?” Izou gave a sigh, also leaning on a desk, looking at the other in a serious manner.

“Ace is sick.”

Marco gave a frown. “Have you told Bay? And what kind of sick, yoi? He seemed fine yesterday.” He gave a sigh again, not too sure how to explain. “He's not ‘sick’ sick. But, he’s not well.” Marco moved a hand to his face. “Izou, if this is a riddle, it’s too early for that.” He gave a serious look at Marco, making him realise this was not a riddle or joke. “It is  _ not  _ a joke! You should have seen his arm! It’s  _ scratched up so damn bad. _ ” Marco frowned. “His arm? Has he scratched it? Why would he do that, yoi?” Izou gave a nod, moving a hand to his face, trying to find a way to explain, knowing this was something many had no idea about.

“When I was young, back at my birthplace, there was this old woman; everyone called her crazy.” Marco gave a frown, on his way to speak, but a glare from him had him shut up, letting him continue. “She always did these crazy things. Doing the same things over and over, like locking her door 8 times, touching door frames, checking her bag 8 times, just doing stuff over and over. And when she didn't, she would pull her hair, stressed she forgot to check her door 8 times, only doing it 7, or something. But, when I got older, I got why. She  _ needed _ to do it, she could not go on with her day without it, ending up pulling out a bunch of her hair, biting her nails- even finger tips- away. She was obsessed with it, calling it OCD, or Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder.” Marco gave a nod. “That sounds bad, yoi. But, what does that have to do with Ace?” Izou nodded.

“I saw Ace make his bed again, and again, and again, counting. I heard he got to 5 before I left, and he wasn't finished. Muttering he needed to hurry since Thatch would come and get him before he was finished, as he have apparently.”

Marco gave a small thoughtful frown. “You think Ace has the Obsessive thing as the woman you knew?” Izou shook his head. “No, I don't think,  _ I know.  _ Marco, he looked  _ starved. His arm was a mess. This is serious.” _

Marco gave a nod, seeming to think. “How did it go with the woman, yoi?” Izou gave a sigh. “I don't know. I left, and we just let her go on when I was there. We never got to help her, many not realising she had a mental disease. I learned that later.” Marco gave a nod. “What do you think we should do, yoi?” He gave a sigh. “We need to help, obviously, I’m just not too sure how. But I am sure Bay knows. But, someone needs to speak to him, and everyone knows he looks up to you, no matter how much he denies it.” One had to be blind to not see Ace looking at Marco with some admiration, loving to bother the other at times.

Marco gave a nod, giving a small sigh. “I will speak to Bay first, yoi. Why don't you go and speak to Pops, and tell someone to take over the part to inform the others about the docking thing.” Izou nodded, standing up. “Sounds like a good idea. Ask Bay first if she knows what it is.” Marco gave him a nod, before he left, heading towards the infirmary. Izou really hoped he was wrong, that he had seen wrong, but he was sure he didn't. He knew Bay knew about this, sure about it. She knew a lot about people and the mind, learning it through the years and everything.

He gave a sigh and went to tell Pops, not too sure how to tell. What if he was wrong, or, worse, what if he was right.

\---x---

Marco had a frown as he walked into the infirmary, not sure what this was, but based on Izou’s reacting, it was serious. Hadn't people said he had OCD? Sounded more like a joke than anything, but it couldn't be that. He was sure Bay knew something about this.

When he got into the infirmary, a nurse, Whiskey, seeing him and calling out for Bay, he was met with the usual glare from the doctor, never liking when he showed up. “Commander Marco,” Started the doctor, “To what do I owe this visit?” He gave a small sigh. “To be honest, I’m not too sure myself, yoi. But, I would like to talk to you, private.” No matter what this was, it was something with Ace, and he didn't want others to overhear if it was nothing. The doctor gave him a look, before she nodded, going into her office, the woman looking at him expectantly. “Now, what would you like to speak about?” He gave a small breath. “Izou just suddenly came and told me Ace looked bad, something about his arm looking like a mess and being thin, speaking about something called OCD, but I don't know what, yoi.”

Bay gave him a serious look, the same Izou had had. “Portgas has OCD? His arm looks like a mess?” He gave a sigh. “I don't know, yoi. From what Izou said, it seems like it. What is it?” Bay gave a nod.

“If Commander Izou is right, which I believe he might be, it is a serious thing.”

Okay, so this was something. Before he could ask more, the doctor spoke. “I will go and check on Portgas, and while I do that, why don't you go and gather the others for a meeting?” He frowned. “Meeting, yoi?” Bay nodded. “Seeing as I believe in Commander Izou’s judgment, knowing he has experience in this, and this is a serious thing, I believe it would be wise to inform everyone. This is not a thing to be taken lightly, especially if Portgas is injuring himself.” Marco blinked. “Injuring himself?” That sounded really bad. Just what was this? The doctor nodded. “I won’t go into details right now, but I will after speaking to Portgas and figuring out a bit more. But, either way, a meeting would still be something I want to have.” Marco gave a nod. “I will go and inform everyone, yoi.” Bay nodded. “Good. It will be there in an hour or so I believe.” Marco nodded and left, informing everyone of a meeting, not telling why as he didn't know entirely himself.

He hoped Ace was fine, and not having what Izou thought. But, as Bay said, he also trusted Izou’s judgement.

\---x---

“It’s called Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder, or OCD for short.” Whitebeard gave a nod, remembering what Izou had said, hoping Bay could shed more light.

Whatever this was, it was a dangerous thing as it caused Ace to hurt himself. He had never really heard about it, but could faintly remember a few telling they had OCD when they freaked about stuff not being in line. But, from what Izou had said, and how Bay seemed to take this as seriously, he guessed it wasn't just that. Curiel gave a small snort. “So, he doesn’t like it when things are a bit misplaced? Is that worth a whole meeting?” Fossa nodded. “Yeah. Like, almost everyone has small bits of that, what makes him so spec-” Bay smashed her hands on the table, a deadly glare at the two commanders, making them shut up and realise they had done bad and said something really wrong.

“ _ This is  _ **_no joke._ ** _ And if you can’t take this seriously,  _ **_I will ask to have you removed as commanders._ ** _ ” _

That had the two swallow, nodding. “I’m sorry,” Started Fossa, “But, I don't get this.” Bay gave an angry sigh, trying to calm herself. She did have the power to request that, and that threat showed this was serious. Bay looked at the man. “And that is why I am here,  _ to explain. _ ” The two gave a nod, not speaking, making Bay take a breath, before she started to explain.

“What this is, OCD, is a mental disorder, which tells the person to do a thing over and over, until they are satisfied, which will be a number, at least in Portgas case. I don't know what number is- he won’t tell that- but it is above 5. But, what this mean is this. If Portgas is interrupted from doing the thing, or things, the times he needs to do in his mind will be stressed, he will be nervous until he does it, or maybe the day is already ruined and he will be nervous all day. But, some are not just nervous, and will do harmful behavior. It can be small things, like biting nails, tapping their foot, or so on. Or, it can be serious, as in biting their inner cheeks, biting fingers, pulling hair, scratching, not eating, insomnia, hitting themselves, and so on. It does seem the bed is one things Portgas needs to do, but there is most likely more.”

Fossa gave a frown, now looking to have regretted what he had said. “Does Ace have that?” Bay gave a nod. “Yes. And, what Portgas does is scratch his arm, and it’s  _ deep, _ also getting insomnia, and small biting at the inside of his cheeks.” Thatch gave a small forlorn look. “He said it was a bug bite on his arm… I didn't think he did that…” Bay gave a sigh.

“Portgas will not admit it, as he is, as most are, ashamed and embarrassed about it, knowing he can’t control it and feeling he should. This is hard for someone to have.”

The captain gave a nod, seeing everyone doing the same. “What do you suggest?” Bay gave a nod. “First off:  _ Let him do it. _ We can’t just stop him. And, he is way too stressed already, missing many days, and this is a calming way. He trusts a few more than others, so just try and ask about it. That being said, I would like to speak to a few of you willing to try and help, and does not find this funny.” No one moved, everyone wanting to help, which made the captain glad to see everyone caring. Bay gave a small glare at Curiel and Fossa, both giving an apologetic look. “I’m sorry, I didn't mean it, I didn't know it could be this serious,” Said Curiel, Fossa nodding to it. Bay gave a sigh, nodding.

“Portgas knows we know, as I have just patched his arm up, a few scratches even needing stitches, and he did say he wants to try and stop, but is unable to. Try to see if you can get more information about it. And if you do,  _ do not  _ go and tell everyone. If he gives you this trust, you keep his trust by not telling. But, try and encourage to tell me. If you find out he has, let's say 10 times he needs to do something, like making the bed, if you catch him doing it and he trusts you, tell him to do it 9 times. And, if he agrees and then seems unsure, remind him he has done it. They do it since if they miss one time, they feel they haven't done it, and it is important for them to do it for some reason. If he opens up and tells why- each thing has a significance for a reason- try to help, speak to him, let him speak, listen.”

By gave a breath. “For now, that's it, at least until I know more.“

The captain gave a nod. He now knew more of it, but he was still confused about all of this, and he would see if he could find anything that could help him understand it more. “Thank you, Daughter. It helped a lot, and we will try.” Bay gave a nod. “Good. And I know this all still seems confusing, but try to understand that Portgas is embarrassed about it, and he does not trust all of you, barely any of you. Be careful and try to gain his trust to help him.” Everyone nodded, and with a last nod, the doctor left.

When the doctor left, everyone looked at him, the captain taking a breath. “Let’s do what Bay said. This is obviously something dangerous, and if you are really unsure about something, try and ask Ace. If not, ask Bay. I can’t say I know much about this.” Everyone gave a nod, Izou giving a sigh. “I don't know much myself, but I have seen it before, and that didn't go well. Mostly since no one took it seriously.” The captain gave a nod. “We won’t do that. This is obviously something serious, especially if it makes Ace hurt himself.” Everyone nodded again, and he could see Thatch hanging his head a bit. He had seen the chef dragging Ace around the last week and half, getting him in the mornings, interrupting what he needed to do. He gave a comforting look to the other. The chef didn't know, but they now knew, and they needed to try and help now, to show they wanted to help.

They would show Ace they wanted to make him comfortable, they wanted to help.

\---x---

Ace gave a breath, trying to calm himself down. He made it, he managed to do it, not being bothered even. It felt good, it felt relaxing. It had been so long since he managed to go through his entire morning routine without being interrupted by Thatch or someone.

He looked around the room, seeing the bed made, doing it the 9 times he needed to do it, seeing the window closed, being sure it was locked as he had locked and unlocked it the same amount, the door to his private bathroom- thank god he had one- being closed, and the drawer being okay- that made no sense, but it still kinda made sense in his head- it felt really good to have done everything. it felt… calming. He took another breath, feeling calm, it felt good. But, at the same time, he felt… mad and sad… Why did he need to do this? He didn't want to do this. Why couldn't he control it? Stupid things, stupid mind.

He gave a sigh as he walked over to the closet, taking a long-sleeved shirt on, to hide the bandages on his arm.

Normally, it should have healed, seeing as devil fruit users healed fast. But, from what Bay said, they didn't heal fast since it was self-inflicted. Apparently, the devil fruit wouldn't heal those kinds of wounds. Stupid if you asked him. He hadn't even noticed how bad it was, not understanding it still. Bay had explained a bit, seeing he didn't get it much himself. He had never heard about this ocd thing. He just… hated himself for not being able to control himself, to control his actions so he could go on without doing this, and not hurt himself when he didn't do this.

He felt like a failure. How could he ever do anything if he couldn't even control his own mind?

Ace shook his head. He felt better now, and would try and take things from here, walking out to face the day, which felt much easier than it had the last week and half.

\---x---

Thatch gave a breath when he saw Ace out, glad to see the kid looking fine, much more so than he had the last week or so.

He had really made the kid look so tense, and he felt awful for it. He would try and see if he could help. He hadn't meant for the kid to scratch his arm until he needed stitches, or to not eat until he looked starved, which apparently only took a week. Well, not a too big of surprise, seeing how much the kid ate. His metabolism must be through the roof. He would remember to keep an eye on how the kid ate. He did at least eat breakfast, in his normal big amount, which was good. Damn, he was the head chef, he should have realised something was wrong when he ate less. What kind of chef was he when he couldn't even realise someone was starving themselves right in front of him.

A bit after breakfast and they were out on deck, he walked over to Ace, who was relaxing close to a railing, him moving to lean on it beside the other, not many out as many was relaxing or doing their duties.

When he was at the railing, he looked at Ace, who was leaning against the healing himself, sending a small look at him, before looking another way. He gave a small breath. “Hey,” He started, just needing to start with something. “I’m sorry about the last week and half. I didn't mean to keep you away from your things you needed to do.” He had no idea how to apologize or what to even call this. He saw Ace shaking his head, still not looking at him. “It’s fine.” Mumbled the kid. He gave a sigh. “No, it’s not. I should have realised something was up. Why didn't you tell I was ruining your day? You know we don’t want you to be unhappy, we want to help. You can tell us any-” Thatch cut off as Ace moved to stand up straight, looking at him with a mixed look.

“Well, I’m sorry if I didn't feel comfortable telling I can’t even fucking control my own actions and fucking almost loses my mind if I don't do stupid shit 9 fucking times! I don't even want to deal with this fucking shit!” With a last look to him, panting and eyes full of many emotions, Ace turned and left.

Thatch clutched his hand as Ace left. Why did he always mess things up? He wanted to go after, to tell he didn't mean it, that he didn't mean it that way. He only wanted to tell they wanted to help, he felt sorry for making the kid not eat and scratch his arm. With a swallow and sigh of defeat, he walked to the one person he hoped could help.

“Marco, I fucked up.”

\---x---

Marco gave a small sigh, knocking on Ace’s door, hoping the other was there.

he had just spoken to Thatch, the other explaining what had happened, why he had suddenly walked up to him and said he had fucked up. He got why the man thought that, seeing Ace’s reaction, also telling what Ace had said, and it seemed like Ace didn't like he had no control over this, the fact he needed to do a few things certain times, from what Thatch told, it had been 9. He was sure Ace had accidentally said that. When he didn't hear anything, he slowly opened the door. He knew he was intruding, but he needed to speak to Ace, to say Thatch didn't mean it like that.

When he saw the inside of the room, he saw Ace standing in front of his bed, making it, before making it again, muttering the number 3, before starting making the bed again.

When he closed the door, Ace sent a look to him, looking a bit emotional, eyes a bit red. “What are you doing here?” Said Ace as he went back to making the bed. He gave a small sigh as he walked a bit closer, standing close to the desk. “I wanted to apologize for Thatch, yoi. He didn't mean it like that.” Ace gave a small snort. “Like what? That I can’t control my own mind?” Marco shook his head. “No, yoi. That he came forward that way. He meant to say we want to help, that while we don’t completely understand it, we don’t mind it and want to help you from injuring yourself. It’s not your fault you're like this.” Ace halted his movements a bit, before starting again, now being on the fifth time.

“He didn't sound like he meant that…” Marco gave a small sigh. “Thatch isn't good with words, yoi. He didn't mean anything bad. I am sure he will do his best to make it up to you, feeling guilty for coming forward the wrong way.” Ace gave a small nod. “I just… don't understand it myself…” He gave a nod. “And that‘s what we want to help with, to help you through it and see why and take things from there, yoi. You don’t need to tell anything now, but when you feel more comfortable with everything, with us.” Ace halted for a few seconds, before starting again, not saying anything. Marco decided to wait for a bit, still wanting to speak a bit with Ace when he was finished.

Marco looked at Ace when he gave a sigh, doing the bed for the 6th time.

“I do it because of my brother… It’s stupid...”

He gave a frown. “Nothing is stupid, not about this. It is what you do, and you have your own reasons for it, yoi.” Ace gave a nod, starting on the 7th time. “I do it… he- my brother- always wanted me to make my bed when we were younger, but I never did. But… then he died… and a voice in my head said ‘If you make your bed, what if he comes back?’ I never realised it would be like this… _ Just a stupid thing _ ...” The last thing was muttered as he started the 8th time. Marco closed his eyes for a second.

That was the stupidest thing he had heard. Not why Ace did it, to that he did it, but that he called it a stupid reason. He had lost his brother, which was the worst thing that could happen; losing family.

When Ace did the bed for the 9th time, the last time, Marco placed a hand on Ace’s shoulder when he was finished, making the other look at him. “The most stupid thing I just heard, was the fact you called it stupid, yoi. It makes sense, it gives you hope, keeps you going. Never call that stupid.” Ace gave him a smile, eyes a bit blank. “Thank you, Marco.” He shook his head. “No reason to thank me for that, yoi. It’s the truth.” Ace gave him a smile, before doing a last small stroke on the bed.

Marco decided to try, try and see if he could get to know Ace, and this, more. “If I can ask, yoi. Do you only do it in the mornings?” He knew Ace always did this in the morning, but still wondered seeing Ace did it now too. Ace halted his last finish on the bed, before slowly starting again, Marco sure he wouldn't answer, and he wouldn't prod. But, after a few seconds, Ace shook his head. “No… I  _ need _ to do it in the morning. But… if I have a hard day, or something bothers me… I do it… and… a few other things…” Ace spoke the last part low, as if not wanting to admit it, eyes downcast.

Marco gave a nod, looking at Ace in a comforting manner, even though the kid wasn't looking at him. “It’s fine. I- we- don't mind you doing this, yoi. If you need to do it, you do it. We just don't like what happens if you don’t complete it, when you get nervous and scratch your arm or doesn't eat. We want to keep that from happening, and to maybe help you lower the times you need to do it.”

Ace turned to look at him, seeming a bit conflicted, half-nervous. “You're… not going to force me to stop..?” Marco blinked. Had Ace not been listening?

“As I said, yoi. You have your own reasons to do it, we don't like what you do if you don't do it. We don't want you to be injured, especially not by your own actions, and something we can keep from happening by let you do small things like make your bed. We want to try and help you lower it, but we will never force you.” Ace looked a bit small confused, unsure. He gave a sigh. “We will  _ never  _ force you to stop. I have an idea how to maybe help lower it, but we can take it later, okay? Or maybe never if it doesn't work. We want to help you, not force you to do stuff, yoi.”

What this was, sat much deeper than he thought. He now saw Ace didn't know this himself, what this actually was, and he would see if he could help Ace with it, to understand they wouldn't force him to do anything. When Ace seemed finished with the bed, the bed looking way better than most bed he had seen, he looked at Ace when he turned around. “I also wanted to say, that if you ever want to speak about anything, you can always come to me, yoi. Even if it’ about the weather, or if you want to try a few things to lower this.”

Ace blinked. “Is there… Is there even something that can help? How can something help when I can’t even control it myself!” Ace sounded mad, mad at himself, and he got that. He gave a small comforting look to the other, understanding this was really bothering him, especially now as they knew. “It might help if you, one morning, do a thing, let’s say, 8 times instead of 9, and either tell us or let us watch. And when you get unsure if you have done it, we say you have, yoi. To calm you.” Ace looked down. “How… how do you know I think I haven't done it? Like, I do it multiple times…” He gave a small smile. “While I don't know much, Bay does, yoi. She said it’s because your mind needs to be sure you've done it, therefore doing it multiple.”

Ace gave a small snort. “Like a damn doctor can tell how I feel. I can manage myself.” And Ace walked past him and out, having an angry and annoyed look.

Marco gave a sigh, now being alone in the room. He didn't know this would be as hard, that Ace was as in denial as he was. He obviously was really bothered by this, but they couldn't do much if he didn't let them.

He hoped Ace would open up and let them help.

\---x---

Whitebeard walked out on deck, not being able to sleep and thought getting some air would help. It was late, so not many was out. Hopefully not Marco, as that would mean a lecture of how he should be sleeping.

When he got out on deck and headed for the front, liking to look at the horizon, also knowing the sun would start to come up soon, seeing as they were at a place where the sun rose early. But, as he was halfway there, he saw someone leaning against the railing to his left, turning to see Ace there, looking to be in thoughts.

He knew Ace had not had it too easy the last weeks, everything from them not realising something was wrong, and then for them to realise it two days ago. He still hadn't found out much about this, but Bay had explained a bit more to him. Marco had also said what had happened earlier today, that Ace felt angry at himself, but not more. He didn't reveal anything, just that this was a sore topic for Ace, not wanting to admit it was a thing, even after half-admitting it. Bay had said that was a thing, and they just needed to do their best to be there for him. He walked up to the kid, the kid sending him a look, before turning to look away.

He gave a small chuckle. “Why are you awake this late, Ace?” The other gave a small snort, taking a chug of a cup he held. “Couldn't sleep. Why else.” The captain gave a small sigh. “I don't know. There are many reasons for one to not sleep. Most often being because one has a lot on one's mind.” He gave a small look to Ace. “Or, it could be because someone is plotting more assassination attempts.” He knew Ace hadn't done any attempts at his head after all of this had started to happen, and he guessed it was since he had other things on his mind. But, it would either start up again, or not. Him hoping for the latter, and that Ace would maybe join their family.

Ace gave a small snort, moving to take a chug of his cup again. “How can I even think of that when I’m not even strong enough to control my own mind. Just weak and pitiful.”

He gave a look to Ace, now understanding what he was drinking; beer, the kid even looking close to drunk. Well, that was one way to deal with one's problems. Not a good one, but one many unfortunately did. He gave a small sigh. “I never thought I would hear someone who managed to beat Jinbei, a warlord, single handedly, call himself weak. Even someone who is a captain in the New World is a really strong-willed person, more so when they are young. It’s an amazing accomplishment in my eyes.”

Ace gave a snort. “And yet I can’t even fucking control my own mind!” Ace threw the cup away, it shattering against a crate, the kid, who he now saw the face to, was obviously drunk. Cheeks even tinted and eyes glassy. Ace gave an angry sigh. “How can I even think of doing  _ anything  _ when I can’t even control my own mind! That’s just weak and useless!” Ace moved a hand to his face, most likely feeling himself being drunk, and not meaning to say all this. He gave a comforting smile. “It will be better, you just need to go on.” Ace gave a snort. “How can it get better? I can’t even go on my day without doing something I don't even want to do! It makes me feel fucking useless! Everything would have just been better if I wasn't here! Who the fuck would want a failure like me!” Ace sounded so broken, so desperate.

And it was the last drop, and the captain moved to crouch down, bringing the turmoiled kid into an embrace, not caring about his struggling.

“Don't you ever say or think that. You are  _ not  _ useless, or any of that! You are one of the strongest and bravest people I know, and nothing will change that. I just wished you would let us, your family, help.”

Ace started off by struggling as he spoke, but as he was finished, the kid had stopped struggling, letting out a sob. “I feel so useless! I can’t control my own mind!” He shook his head, hugging the turmoiled boy closer. “That is not true. I know you will be able to do this, you can face and overcome this. I am sure of it, son.” Ace didn't speak, but he felt the kid grasp onto his captain jacket, still sobbing.

Ace was clearly really turmoiled by this, that he needed to do what he did at times. But, he was sure Ace would be able to overcome it, especially if he let them help. “Everything will be fine, Ace. You will overcome this, you just need to continue to go on. Let us help, we only want to help. That’s that family does.” Ace still didn't speak, but he felt him grasp his jacket more, making the captain hug the other closer, wanting to make Ace understand he was anything but weak and useless. He was strong and amazing, that was why he wanted him in the family.

They stood like that for a while, before he heard Ace stop sobbing, then the arms letting go of his jacket, him looking down to see Ace having fallen asleep. He gave a sigh. Ace was drunk, so that wasn't much of a surprise. He wondered if Ace would even remember this in the morning. He hoped he did, so he would know they wanted to help. He didn't like that the kid that so lowly of himself. Ace was a really strong person, managing to do amazing stuff.

The captain moved and lifted Ace up in his hand, taking him to his bedroom, placing him in bed and dragging the covers over him. “Sleep well, son.” He said, before he left, staying out a bit and watching the calm ocean. He wished Ace would trust them more, let them help him through this.

But, what he hoped for the most, was for Ace to value himself more, to not think so lowly of himself. He hoped, and was sure, Ace could overcome this.

\---x---

Ace gave a sigh, not sure if he should do this, not sure if he  _ could  _ do this. He really wanted to be able to do it.

It had been 3 days since he had gone out and gotten himself stupid drunk, meeting the captain. He was a bit surprised himself he remembered the night, not always doing that, and wasn't sure how to deal with all of this. Could he really believe what they said? Not only what the captain or Marco said, but what everyone either said or hinted at? He didn't know, but he felt he maybe should think of trying. He already felt on edge, not sure if he could do this, to leave his room right now.

He took a deep breath, before he turned around, having done his bed only 8 times. He would try and get a control over his mind.

When he walked out the door, he had to really force himself to go to the galley, to not walk back into the room and do it all over again, keep reminding himself he had done it, he had made the bed, he had closed the window and door, he had checked the drawer. It was done, all of it, but he felt the bed, which he now only did 8 times, really bothered him. He took a few deep breaths as he walked to the galley, breakfast being now, and walked to sit down where he usually sat, which was close to the commanders. As he took some food and was about to eat, he felt he really couldn't, because what if he forgot it? Ace shook his head. No, he had not. He took a deep breath. “Marco,” He started, making the other give a hum. Ace took a small breath again, looking at the other.

“I made my bed today.” Marco blinked, before he gave a smile and a nod. “You have made the bed, and I am sure it is as perfect as you do it, yoi. He would have been proud.”

The last past had him clench his teeth a bit. That was why he did it, to make Sabo proud, to be sure he did it, so Sabo would be proud. Marco had seen how he did things, how it looked, so he trusted the man was right.

With a last deep breath, he moved and started to eat, repeating the fact he had done the bed in his mind, Marco mentioning it a few times, Ace noticing it was when he unconsciously moved a hand to his arm, on his way to scratch, the reminder making him stop.

He had made it, and it was fine. He could do this, he just needed a bit of help.

He could get his mind back under his control.

\---x---

Marco gave a chuckle, seeing Ace and Thatch running around and having fun, the kid having bandages on his back from the still healing tattoo. He was really glad things had turned out great.

Ace still had things he needed to do, at times still opening up about them. He was better, days he could just do it once and just go on, but still had days he needed to do it multiple times, but not nearly as bad as before, Ace having said he never did it more than 3 times now, and sometimes it was enough to just check the drawer, which was the last thing he did before he left, being a reminder he had done the other stuff. Ace had also never scratched his arm as bad as earlier. He still did at times, but it was lightly done and never lasted long, and was always on the day he was more unsure. And, if Ace had a day he was unsure, he would tell him at breakfast, telling it via telling he had made the bed, closed the window and door, and checked the drawer. It was a way to tell he was having a small bad or nervous day. But, it was way better than before, Ace being more carefree and trusting them more, opening up more, seeming to like himself more.

He knew Ace would manage to get better. And Bay had said he would most likely never completely stop, but get to this point, which had taken almost 2 months of hard work, and he could get even better.

They would do their best for Ace, to make him feel better and comfortable here.

**Author's Note:**

> And that’s the fic, hope you enjoy
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> This was just a small thing to handle an issue I know many both know and don't know about, also to tell the Mental Health series is not abandoned. Feel free to come with requests to new topics, or if you want me to delve more into one I already have done( I will do DID when I have the time, but that will be a long one, so other things than that while I figure things out)
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> Hope you enjoyed it, and if you have the time, I greatly appreciate feedback
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> If you want to, come follow me on Twitter, where pictures and such will be posted, as well as updates and if I'm late. My twitter is[ @Azuruko (Link also at my profile) You can leave comments, requests, ideas, or just say hi](https://twitter.com/azuruko)
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> Or, you can join my Discord server, Azuruko’s fiction, for the same reasons as my twitter. Instant invite:[https : / / discord . gg / 6hzMhbR ](https://discord.gg/6hzMhbR)
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> And to OCD: It is a **big**  
>  thing and aspect, and I gave Ace this one, needing to do things over and over, to keep himself calm. It can be more and other things, as in touching door frames, needing to clean everything, needing to count each step and not take more than such steps during a day, do stuff at the right time, doing it for the right amount of time, it’s a lot. It can even be something as overanalyzing everything and not going out, because your brain obsessed over everything and anything that could happen
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> And to help the person having issues can differ, and I chose this way seeing as I did a ‘It’s in the pirate era, medicine against this might not exist’, but it does exist in our world, but if it is mild, it can be helped without. And while Ace’s nervous tic was big, the rest was between bad and mild, as I wanted to do that. If one does not get help, it can, and often will, get worse and worse, more things one needs to do. The person having the issue might not even realise it themselves. Help is often needed and getting help from family and friends is crucial often, and the way I chose often(not always) works if it’s mild or between mild and serious, but still a big bother in daily life. It is also normal to not get rid of the habit completely, but to overcome it and have it more manageable like Ace now is
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> That being said. You know those who need to have things straight? Those who needs to have thing aligned and right color scheme? And if they aren't, it will bother them? That **is not OCD,**  
>  that is called perfectionism. It can come with OCD, especially the cleaning one, but to just want to have things straight or in the right color scheme is not. I don't mind people saying it or joking about it, and I have mild OCD(a bit like Ace’s but not as bad nervousness tics when I can’t complete what I need to do or are interrupted) but don’t confuse the two together if someone legit have OCD, it is a serious condition many forgets about since so many jokes about it


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